Blur or Blah

This monday I have an on-the-job interview working in the field of trade i've been in before I was laid off in September. Which is great! and kinda sucks. It will be nice to get out of the house and be in the "real world", or so it's called. But, It will leave me with less time to concentrate on writing and that sucks. But I'm convinced that I can still keep writing as long as I just stayed focus and disciplined. I must give myself a schedule and set aside time to write every night even if its only a few words a night. It will keep me in the mindset to keep writing, not to throw in the towel and to give in to "just doing my job". A job will pay some bills but it is not going to make me happier. So anyway, I started to come up with a few more story ideas so I can have more than one thing to work on and hopefully avoid the chances of getting bored with any particular story. Hopefully the strategy is more of a help than a hinderance ...we shall see. :)   till next time. nighty night.

GOTHROCK FUN!!

LOL  going through my stash-box, I found a lovely little song I wrote in 2002 I believe. It was a parody, slight homage to goth music from the 1980's. A little inspired by the Alien Sex Fiends and Joy division, groups I still dig by the way :)

Its hilarious, as it was meant to be. So, I figured i'd share it. I actually recorded it and have it posted on Myspace.


ANATHEMA MARANA THA
 by: M.Cooper


I look in the mirror, Is this what I've become. A sideshow freak for everyone.
Everywhere I turn, they point and they scream. Horrified faces run away from me.
A satchel full o' make-up, for a mask to wear. I hide my face to avoid the stares.

anathema marana tha

They treat me like a plague, some kind of disease.
Their eyes are like scalpels aimed to cut me.
I try to find, a place to hide, a cold black void inside my mind.......

Then she appears , like a mist in the clear. Kneels over me and wipes the tears.
I've never seen a angel dressed up in black. But there is no use in turning back.
She leads me to her dungeon, her house of hell. If I only had a soul to sell
I would give it freely to my queen. My newly found sweet evil fiend.

anathema marana tha

She lays her mouth, softly on my lips. Her eyes, an eclipse.
Her hair wraps around me like a spider's web, Am I alive or am I dead?
We embrace, disgrace, deface our bodies till we efface.
Oh, I can't believe this is happening to me. My loins are swollen, my body bleeds.
"It's not over" she says to me, the beast between her thighs still need to feed.
I stab and stab and stab at her wound. But, this dragooning won't end so soon.

anathema marana tha

Lying breathless upon the floor, with the wicked one that I adore.
The sweet scented smoke fills the room, Syzygium Aromaticum.
We take a deep breath of the tainted air. A dream-like state , without a care.
Gazing at the ceiling, with the look of doom. We shall arise with the moon.

anathema marana tha

I awake from our bed, killing head.The newest member of the living dead.
There's no sound, I take a look around. My only love can't be found.
I creep through the halls, to see where she's gone. Then I hear the Banshee's song.
I'm frozen with fear as I move near. I see her there when the fog starts to clear.
She flies at me, burning eyes of lust. I've made love to a succubus!

anathema marana tha


Well, I hope you enjoyed this trip through memory lane with me. I had fun sharing. Till next time.

END OF DAY ONE

Well this is the end of day one. Haven't got as much as I would have liked to gotten done today. But it was a busy day. Had daycare kids by myself today. My son had to go in for his regular check up. But I did pick a story idea from my stash-box and began to try and structure it and wrote and few lines. Nothing is in stone but I feel like it may have promise to bloom into what I'm trying to achieve with the story in my mind. I just need to try and keep more focus on writing "lines", instead of writing "words". The words will give themselves to me regardless. I must not obsesses so much with the details until a full draft of concept is done. Then I can re-write and add all the magic words " abracadabra ".    :)

Here's a couple of lines from the project
I'm calling it : WASHED UP (of course still not in stone haha )

let me know what you think.

WASHED UP


Pulsating, flashing red and blue lights fall on the face of a tearful woman as she screams the undeniable sounds of loss. The rain drenched officer tries to gently grab the woman's arm, only not in time before she falls to her knees. Writhing fits of clinching denial eat away at her instantaneously. The officer lifts her hunching dead weight,and guides her from the foyer to the plush couch sitting in the middle of her modest home. The soft Sonoran textiles offer no comfort, no rest for the racing heart trying in vain to turn back the hands of time. The rain hits the outside of the windows, bleeding out the sounds of the world.




" Mrs. Hernandez……." , whispers a faint voice.


The woman's eyes open up, blinded by the mascara running down her face and the buzzing fluorescent lights above the bright, white halls. She looks around and finds herself sitting alone in a row of empty red fiberglass chairs. Standing down the corridor is a man in a white jacket carrying an electronic tablet. Upon his jacket coat pocket, an I.D. badge.


Dr. Lewis Feingold , M.D.
Medical Examiner
Pima County Hospital


"Mrs. Hernandez we are ready for you…unless you need a little more time.", the doctor says with clarity.


Mrs. Hernandez takes her tissue and cleans up her eyes and inhales a large breath of air and slowly exhales,trying to compose herself as much as she is capable of. With a quick brush of her hair from her fingertips and a straightening of her dress, she guides her will to stand up with the elegance of a movie star.


"I'm very sorry we have to meet again under these circumstances, Mrs. Hernandez. Is there anything I can get you before we proceed? Would you like a glass of water? There is no rush ,the police are still in the middle of their investigation….", politely the doctor said before being interrupted.


"Nope, I'd like to get home as quickly as possible if you don't mind. I think I've been here enough this week, don't you? But,thank you anyway doctor". She snipped while swallowing the saddening rage and disbelief inside.


"Yes…Yes, I understand Mrs. Hernandez. Please forgive me. We'll go ahead and proceed then. If you'll just follow me please?". A little hurt by the woman's shortness with him, he shows her down the hall. Even after 30 years of service with the hospital, he knows this part of the job is never easy work. 


They walk through a surgically chromed, large set of double metal doors. Above the swinging doors a white plastic plate hangs with the word MORTUARY.
The room is filled with a familiar smell to the woman. An odor she never thought she would ever have to smell again for the rest of her life.The cold space is painted blue, the color of the death shrouds covering the cartfuls of cadavers. They approach a table covered in the standard issued sheets of the mortuary, the doctor goes toward the head of the covered body, looks up to the woman. Mrs. Hernandez's eyes begin to tear up again.


"Would you like me to remove the sheet Mrs. Hernandez or would you like a minute to yourself to identify the body"? Dr. Feingold delicately asks.


"Yes, please… a minute alone.", she replies.

I know it isn't a whole lot. I did write some more stuff for it, but its just snippets of the entire timeline of the story and a few quotes here a there. Anyway. I'm off to hopefully write some more before I hit the sack  :)

DAY ONE, Tues. april 5 2011

My oldest son and I checking out the sites
on the way home from Florida.

Well I guess I'll just start off by saying hello and thank you for checking out my blog.This is the first blog I have ever had. I'm not normally the type to talk (or write) about how I "feel" about certain subjects or what I'm doing on a day-to-day basis in this kind of format. I do however, love to write about how I feel in poems or song lyrics or write short stories or movie ideas, and have since I was a kid. But I've decided that has got to change If I'm ever to get out of the situation I am currently in. I am the father of two amazingly handsome and silly little boys and married to a very tough and smart woman. We have currently been fighting with the bank (name of bank withheld but should be obvious to anyone in the same situation) to keep our home for the last year and a half, after my wife was then fired from her job while pregnant with our second son and later I too had falling victim to the economic downturn and lost my job a few months later. After the long song and dance of them lying, losing paperwork making false claims and going through several different negotiators etc. ,we have to decided not to fight it anymore and let them take the house and stick it in (your discretionary orifice of choice). My wife and I run an in-home daycare now to make the mortgage,and all of our living expenses. While it works for the short term it is not a realistic long term plan for us to create a better world for ourselves or our children. So I have decided to create this blog as a written commitment to myself and my family to stop letting my shyness or lack of self-esteem from time to time keep us from better ourselves and to stand against the boundaries of self-doubt created by myself or by the powers all around us, which try and enslave our minds everyday with doom, gloom, apocalyptic visions of our future and war. And I will attempt to win our freedom with creating dreams and opening up the doors to imagination and infinite possibilities and quite possibly, a scream or two. ;) all with the power of a few keystrokes.